Toe Jam

So somehow I hurt my toe yesterday. It could have been the impromptu football session in the afternoon or it could be early onset old age. Either way, I awoke this morning by a severe pain in my right big toe. Those that know me will rightly assume that I tried with all my will to go back to bed. A good nap after all is only second to a good buffet in my book.

Well the toe pain was too intense to sleep and I later found too intense to walk or drive so I stayed home.

The funniest part of the day was when I stubbed the already injured toe on a shoe in my bedroom. I took the next ten minutes to chastise the shoe for being a fucking idiot.

Runner-up was the reaction my boss had to me telling him I hurt my toe. Honestly, who calls in with a toe injury. I almost thought of faking a rotator-cuff pull but then thought better of it. So here I am one shoe on, one shoe off, knee deep in pain killers.

The true shit of the matter is I have ice cream in the fridge but I can’t walk to go get it. Sometimes I really do believe there is a god, because this just too good to be coincidence.


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